The Dark Night of the Soul

When we undertake a difficult task, there always comes a point when we are at our lowest. A point where no matter what we do, we seem stuck in our problems and nothing we do seems to move us forward. In this state, the most obvious decision would be to cut our losses and do something else, to give up, to make a strategic exit.

In the catholic faith, this period is known as the Dark Night of the Soul. When we feel stationary, when the novelty of the Christian faith wears off and our prayers seem unanswered and our soul seems unable to advance. Prayer seems unrewarding, and God seems so far away. We wallow in our own Gethsemane and the temptation to run away and to give up is at its strongest.

This is usually the time that preceeds the moment when we move closer with God, a moment in our spiritual journey that brings us closer to our creator and renews our faith. In life, the lowest points in our lives are usually just moments before we succeed. The sad thing is, many give up before the next step can be taken.

I have been struggling with difficult cases and difficult situations for the past year. When friends turn against you, when people expect miracles, when workload overwhelms. Each time, the temptation to cut losses and move on is great. When the burden is overwhelming, why not just discard the burden? It became so strong that I was on the verge of giving up and considered moving to greener pastures elsewhere.

However, God does not give us easy tasks. What's the point in that? In weight training, there is no point in training with weights you can comfortably carry. You carry weights that provide a challenge if you wish for muscular growth. You don't give up when you carry heavier weights, you grit your teeth and move through the session, knowing that its beneficial. I realised that the difficulties and pressures I face can only build me up, but only if I stick to it and not give up. Once I realised that, the way became clearer to me. God was not being unfair or cruel. He was building me up.

So I learnt not to give up, to move steadily forward through whatever may come, knowing that it is just another stage in my spiritual development.

Because in the Long Night of the Soul, when the night is at its darkest, is when we can see the stars most clearly.